My time to win

I was asked this question `Never mind the turtle. Don't you think you're sure to win?' And the below was my answer :-

Not in a 100 meters sprint I won’t! Nor a 400 meters, much less an actual marathon!

I’m more of a `Quitters Never Win’ person. There are many trials, tribulations, challenges imposed in my life and of course, I didn’t win all of them. Some of them I’ve to re-do, start over, only to be defeated again. So these days I choose my battles. No need to fret over small things when there are so many other things to lose brain cells over. Better to prepare for the war. And what’s all this about always winning? Like how we sometimes make mistakes in order to learn what is right, I think there’s nothing wrong to lose..…though not every single time!

The important thing is to NEVER QUIT at whatever we mean to win at something we’re  keeping our eyes at. It’s how bad you want it, how determined you are, how you’d brush off those dust you’ve bitten and stand up again. It’s a personal journey and more of a war within yourself that you’ve to struggle to win. You don’t have anyone to disappoint other than yourself and that is one of the worse feeling to have, to be disappointed at yourself.

I’ve had this constant war I’ve been fighting for most of my past AND present time. That’s called losing weight. My mom told me that when I was born, I weighed 2.6kg with full set of hair. After that I kept growing and growing….…and growing….…and to make sure I made the point…I grew some more.  And my hair kept thinning…..just to make things more interesting!

But of late, since my hospital admission on May 2011, I found this `point of no return’ for me. I guess it was the `do or die’ moments, crossroads, lowest time, whatever people call it. For the first time in my life, I lost weight and I mean really lost weight. To date, I’ve lost 9kgs. I was 100kgs on May 2011. My heaviest being 120kgs when I was due for my 2^nd caesarean, I’m so embarrassed (at myself) as the weighing scale at the hospital that I stood on was already at it’s maximum digit. How will they weigh a person more than 120kg? A cow scale? Don’t laugh, it’s not the least bit funny to me.  

Hence this so-called `marathon’ I put up on my title blog, it means a life long run for me, not physically but in my lifestyle and diet. I read somewhere before that losing weight (and maintain that ideal weight) is a marathon run, not a sprint. My monthly target is to lose 3kgs every month and my target weight is at 66kg. The number 6 has always been my lucky number, so why not. I’m not aiming for skinny, I’m aiming at healthy. My ultimate prize is my health. I’ve been a type 2 diabetic for 15 years, an asthmatic for 26 years. I may not be so lucky the next time.

Now, THIS is the type of race I cannot afford to lose or ever give up. And I’m determined as hell to win this time. Amen.